Disappointed? Let’s talk!
Disappointment! That is a word that everyone knows and feels at some point during the business of living. Disappointment usually comes whether you expect it or not. You might be feeling great in a moment, and the next moment, something happens that causes disappointment. Recently, a considerable disappointment occurred that I had to handle. So I decided to write about my process.
At first, I want to clarify what causes disappointments. Disappointments occur because we have expectations. Expectations for work, for studies, for relationships, for ourselves, and much more. When these unmet expectations arise, we feel disappointed. Then the disappointment could lead to unhappiness or pain.
Handling disappointments is a vital skill for everybody; otherwise, living becomes unbearable. We need a system to process disappointments, and here are a few thoughts that help me through the process:
Recognize that expectations could lead to disappointments: Earlier, I mentioned that expectations lead to disappointment if expectations are unmet. The higher our expectations, the higher the possibility of being disappointed. We all have expectations, and some expectations are higher than others. We need to understand the relationship between our expectations and the potential for disappointment. This relationship does not mean we should have no expectations. It merely means we should be aware of this relationship.
Disappointments are not final: Even though a disappointing situation occurred, it does not mean we cannot remedy the problem. Unfulfilled expectations are not the end. They can be dealt with or changed with a little extra work.
Talk about it: This aspect of the process is essential. Talk to someone about it, do not keep the disappointment to yourself. Talk to God or whoever you are inclined to believe in about it. Disappointments can weigh us down, so we need God and, sometimes, loved ones to help us see the positives in the disappointment.
Do something about it: This is usually the final part of the process for me. I need to do something about the situation. Either it is to keep silent, pray for the condition, or take practical steps. This point has a proactive component to it. Instead of feeling terrible about the situation and allowing the disappointment to fester, we can do something.
There you go, this is my process for dealing with disappointments, and it has served me well over the past few years. Adapt it to your unique situation or use it as it fits into your life.
